It was Real

He said that he loved me

that he will never leave me

He kissed me

He smiled.

And I fell for it

I stopped breathing

and took the ticket

to an unforgetable ride.

I laughed

He lauged

I wanted more

But when I just found the courage

When I collected a big pile of strengh

I woke up.

From something they called a "dream"

from something I was told was not real.

You can comment in Hebrew, I DO understand you know.. :)

Dear God,

Today you will decide whether I will live or die.

Today you will decide how much I will suffer or laugh.

I would like to take this opportunity and maybe change your mind.

I know I am not perfect, and day by day I go to sleep hating myself to death.

I cant remember the night I havent cried, the night I was happy with myself and didnt want to die.

I have done so many bad things, I really dont deserve much

But please God, please Father, have mercy.

If I could change the past there are many things I wouldnt have done.

But sorry God, I cant change it.

I will say goodbye to this world knowing I didnt make you proud

Knowing I made too many mistakes, too much bad.

So when you decide to write me in the book of death, please dont.

I have done wrong and this feeling followes me wherever I go.

I am not playing a game.

I swear.

Have mercy and I will try to change

Forgive me and I will do as much as I can to become a better person.

Please God, Please the Almighty,

Forgive me.

Please forgive me for everything I have done. Whether I knew it or not. Whether is was serious or not.

I am sorry.