לפני שאני מתחיל את הפוסט הזה,כמה מילות הקדמה ברשותכם...

לפני שמונה חודשים ויום אחד בדיוק התגייסתי,בסביבות השעה ארבע אחרי הצהריים קיבלתי ולבשתי בפעם הראשונה את המדים שלי.

מאז החיים שלי השתנו ללא היכר,לצערי לא לטובה.

הפרק הרע הזה בחיים שלי נגמר לפני שבוע, התעוררתי ופקחתי את העיניים אחרי שיחה שכמוה לא הייתה לי אף פעם עם אמא.

ועכשיו אני מביט לאחור ורק מתחיל להבין ולהתגבר על הכל.

כן,עדיין קשה לי, קשה לי להתמודד ולהשלים עם הבנאדם שהייתי עד לאחרונה.

קשה לי לסלוח לעצמי על מה שנתתי לעצמי לאבד,ועל איך שפגעתי בעצמי ובאנשים שהיו ועדיין כלכך יקרים לי.

קשה לי לקבל את היהירות וההכחשה שהייתי שרוי בהן במשך כלכך הרבה זמן וקשה לי לקבל את העובדה

שכל נורת אזהרה נדלקה ואני הייתי היחיד שלא שם לאן אני מוביל את עצמי.

וזה מזכיר לי שיר שכתבתי.

אבל את כל מה שאני מרגיש וחושב על שבעת החודשים האחרונים אי אפשר לבטא או להסביר במילים,לפחות לא במילים של שיר אחד...אז אספתי את השירים שליוו אותי במשך התקופה הזאת,השירים שמתחברים אצלי לרגשות האלו ומסמלים

את התקופה הזאת שהסתיימה...והנה הם כאן לפניכם...

אז...הנה זה מתחיל...

הקולאז'

פרולוג-חלק א':"מורעל"

"Eternal light, but it's the light that never warms..."

Astronomy - Metallica

"And now what you've all been waiting for,

"I give you me, who suffers the truth

Bad Seed - Metallica

"Dolls of voodoo, all suck with pins

One for each of us

"And our sins

"And in time, the needles turn from shine to rust"

"Only you can tell in time, if we fall or mearly stumble"

"...Break this curse"

Fixxxer - Metallica

And satisfaction this way comes"

"...And satisfaction here it's gone again

"?Why cure the fever, what ever happened to sweat"

Attitude - Metallica

"?Will I be defined by things I could have been"

Before Tomorrow Comes - Alter Bridge

"The apple of your eye, the rotten core inside"

Had Enough - Breaking Benjamin

"Beyond the suffering you've known

"I hope you'll find your way

"Know that you've made such a difference

"All you leave behind - live to the end

"Some day, I too will fly and find you again"

Blackbird - Alter Bridge

"I tried to carry you and make you whole

"But it was never enough, I must go

Watch Over You - Alter Bridge

"I remember a time when I was free,when I could fly away"

"It was my dream, and still is today"

"?Changes come,changes go, where they lead how will we ever know"

"I'd sacrifice all that I have and more

"Forever until death do us part

,All those pictures painted by your hand"

,I still remember how beautiful

"Nothing's changed you're still the one i'm dreaming of

Sacrifice - James LaBrie

"The less I have, the more I'll gain"

"Roamer, wanderer, nomad, vegabond"

"I adapt to the unknown, under wandering stars I've grown

"By myself but not alone

Wherever I May Roam - Metallica

Despite it all you made it worse"

"It left you lonely, it left you cursed

Your Love Alone - Manic St. Preachers

"Break free and bite my way out of this hole"

"One last hope to rise and break away

Above the fading line

"Way beyond the ties that bind

Ties That Bind - Alter Bridge

But your thoughts will soon be wandering..."

The way they always do

When you're riding 16 hours

And there's nothing much to do

And you don't feel much like riding

"You just wish the trip was through

"Here I am, on the road again...there I go, turn the page"

"Later in the evening, as you lie awake in bed...you smoke the day's last cigarrette

"Remembering what she said

Turn The Page - Metallica

"Gone insane, but the memory remains..."

The Memory Remains - Metallica

"The door cracks open but there's no sun shining through"

What I've felt, what I've known"

"Sick and tired I stand alone

Lay beside me, tell me what I've done"

"The door is closed on your eyes, but now I see the sun

Unforgiven II - Metallica

So wash your face away with dirt"

"It don't feel good until it hurts

Carpe Diem Baby - Metallica

The people disappear...splashing through the rain"

"I'll dream with them one day

"Hidden by diguise, stumbling at a world,feeling uninspired"

Still awake, I continue to move along"

"Cultivating my own nonsense

Welcome to the waste lands"

"Where you'll find ashes, nothing but ashes

"Nowhere to turn, I laugh all the way back home"

Trial Of Tears - Dream Theater

But those days are gone now"

 "Changed like a leaf on a tree

The words stuck in my mind, alive from what I've learned"

"I have to seize the day

So far or so it seems"

All is lost

 "With nothing fulfilled

Tripping through, the life fantastic"

"Lose a step, and never get up

I was blinded by a paradise"

 Utopia high in the sky

 A dream that only drowned me

 "Deep in sorrow, wondering why

I'm much wiser now"

A lifetime of memories

"Run though my head

A Change Of Seasons - Dream Theater

"I've drawn regret from the truth"

What I've Done - Linkin Park

"?Am I who I think I am"

"Look out my window and see it's gone wrong"

"I drink from the cup of denial"

Dirty Window - Metallica

And it feels right this time"

"On this crash course with we're in the big time

"Pay no mind to the distant thunder"

Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of the tunnle"

"is just a freight train coming your way

No Leaf Clover - Metallica

"I want you to know I'd die for one more moment"

Goodnight Kiss - Dream Theater

"הכל נשכח ורק נשארת הדממה

כמו כרית ישנה שאיבדה רכותה

כי עם הזמן הכל חולף"

"וקולה כבר דעך, אין דקירות, אין כאב"

"אישה שקרית, מיטה מקרית, למי איכפת?

עם הזמן - אביב גפן

"You follow your deepest reality"

The Only - Static X

Hard to tell my nights now from my days"

"The curtains hide my feelings

Burn It Down - Alter Bridge

"I have been too distant, sometimes just too far away"

"Sorry if I've hurt you, sorry for the time we've lost"

Slow Burn - James LaBrie

"I'm lost, show me the way"

Thought I saw the sign, perhaps I should have turned"

"I really see just fine, guess I'm not concerned

Lost - James LaBrie

"Morning comes to early, and night time falls to late"

"The shadow I've been hiding in is fled from me today"

Surrounded - Dream Theater

Full of grief I scream at the wind"

Thought I heard the words of others"

"Imprison myself and stay in the shell"

"I'd never submit to the ones I will not be like"

"I still feel incomplete, friend are few and far between"

Living In A Hole - Pantera

I could sail by on the winds of silence"

"And maybe they won't notice

The Silent Man - Dream Theater

"For every sign I recognize, another one escapes me"

"The tide you swim against will carry you back home"

I Walk Beside You - Dream Theater

"Where do I begin to heal these wounds of self denial"

"You've been blinded, living like a one way cold existance"

"I can't break out of this prison all alone"

This Dying Soul - Dream Theater

"Some day, yet, he'll begin his life again"

Pearl Jam - Even Flow

"Pretend you're fine and don't need help from anyone"

"Lie to yourself, and thereby to everyone else"

Eight Easy Steps - Alanis Morissette

If I could have my wasted days back"

"?Would I use them to get back on track

"Look ahead but keep on turning"

Frantic - Metallica

צפו בקרוב לחלק ב' של הפרולוג,אחריו יבוא האפילוג