המדריך לחיים הטובים,

I feel like something is burning inside me, but I'm afraid to let it come out.

Sometimes, just for a little moment, I want to scream and let it all out, because I can't stand it anymore! But this moment is so short until it disappears. And then, I feel stupid, really stupid… It's like I'm missing out something all the time.

And again, it’s the time for having a serious decision about what am I going to do now… but… something is stopping me, a voice in my head sais "maybe it will change, maybe its not so bad after all" and then, after I saw it didn’t change, I continue suffering and calling myself stupid once again… and nothing is changed.

I keep telling myself "ill do this and that and say this…" and more bullshit like that. But I just continue suffering.

Well yes, if I do what I feel that I need to do, it will have implications. So fucking what?! All the shit I'm being through doesn’t worth it!

I need to be focused on what I want and on whatever is good for me, and that is the first and last thing that needs to interest me.

That's all,

Bye (until the next stupid thing I'm gonna do).

Thanks for listening.

I'm going to wash my hands…