Searching for pure, old fashioned, nonsense

How do you feel about the dead? I asked Sakerdon Mikhailovich.      Completely negatively said Sakerdon Mikhailovich.    I'm afraid of them.      Yes, I can't stand  dead people either I said.   Give me a dead person and, assuming  he's not a relative of mine, I would be  bound to boot him one.      You shouldn't kick corpses said Sakerdon Mikhailovich.      I would give  him a good booting, right in the chops said I. I can't stand dead people or children.      Yes, children are vile agreed Sakerdon Mikhailovich.      But which do you think are worse: the dead or children? I asked.      Children are perhaps worse, they get in our way more often. The dead at least don't burst into our lives said Sakerdon Mikhailovich.

Daniil Kharms

סוף סוף מצאתי תירגומים לאנגלית של חרמס, הם די צולעים אבל זה עדיין משהו להמונים האומללים שלא יודעים לקרוא ברוסית