Now he has a girlfriend. After proclaiming his internal love for me and claiming he'll never find someone else.
And true, I shouldn't feel jealous, I have no right to feel jealous. he has to move on. I told him to move on. I
was the one that ended everything before something even started,
because really, you can't have a long distance relationship. Not when
it's so fucking far away and you have no idea when you'll meet again
So
why the fuck did it hurt to find it out? I mean, i moved on. I dated.
When he was with his ex, it didn't bother me. well, maybe just a tiny
bit, but not like this. Could it be it's because i'm alone? but i was
then as well
Seriously,
what the fuck? why can't I stop thinking about how unfair it is, that
she gets to kiss him, and be with him, and do everything I never had
the chance to. why can't i stop looking at out pictures together? I
feel pathetic.
I don't
know if it's even about him. Lately i'm thinking that everything I do
is out of pure desperation. That i want to be with someone so badly,
that it doesn't matter with whom.
Sometimes I really wish I was lesbian.
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