time of writing, 7.7.09, time around 16:00pm.

i have to do somthing before i hurt my self more then i can handle it.

maybe taking all the pills in one shot ain't that bad idea. sure, i will die, but at least i'll be happy.

i'm afraid of what he will say if i ever bring up the subject again.

my hand hurt just from the thought of metal on my skinn again.

i dunno how long can i hold my self. afraid from what i may do... soon.

suddenly, the pain, can be the thing that was missing all this years.

i love him, i know i love him more then he love me... i don't care. i guess i should have told him that the pain in my heart never fully healed. and that i'm afraid it will come back again.

for the people who will read this note, i'm not gonna kill my self, not yet.

Nemo.

lost in the way i see things.