I wanted to clear up something I wrote to Mr. Kotzker on a reply to his last post. I told him and someone who argued with him to stop it, because the 'dosim' (pejorative name for religious Jews, singular 'dos') have the nerve to lie about their own religion.
So, to explain, here's a true story:
When I was born, I had some illness that because of it my bris was to be postponed. My parents discussed the issue if I should be circumcised or not, but eventually my father talked my mother into doing it, fearing the social stigma.
My mother said, 'Alright, but I want the one who'll circumcise my child to be also a certified doctor, and I don't want it to be a party or anything [Jews usually make the bris a big occasion, with lots of sinister joy].'
Thus, she began looking for rabbis who are willing to do it, asking them if a minyan (the presence of at least ten Jewish men, used mostly in common praying) is needed. They all replied it is. My mother, however, thought it was absurd. What about a child whose family couldn't find ten Jewish men who were able to come within an eight-day period?
So she went to buy Kitsur Shulkhan Arukh, which is a book which summarises the basics for the Halakha (religious Jewish law, based on interpretation of the Torah, or Pentateuch, and the Talmud, which is another important Jewish religious text. It's complicated, go look for it on Wikipedia). She looked it up in the book, and guess what? The minyan is not obligatory! It's just a custom, and because the religious people stick so blindly and foolishly to the customs, they had the nerve to lie to my mother. (They usually also suck the blood off babies' penes; this is a tradition from the third century, if I remember correctly, named Metsitsa baPe, 'sucking by the mouth', and often give them herpes. But that's irrelevant.) EDIT: Immelmann brought to my attention the fact I'd forgotten to write the end of the story. She managed to find someone who was also a surgeon, and she told him there won't be a party. He answered, 'You've done your homework, I see...' (Otherwise he would've told her there must be a party.)
So eventually it was done with only my mother (I think), father, some other despicable mongrel, and the Mohel (who should be afraid, VERY afraid, because I won't hesitate to maim him severely when I see him), on my mother's desk (fortunately, we moved since then). It was under local anæsthesia, that's true. But my little brother's bris was done the same way, and even though I was outside of the house, I remember his blood-freezing scream to this very day.
Just to clear things up, back then having no party at the bris was unheard of, let alone not circumcising the child at all. What my mother did was revolutionary, as far as revolutionary could go back then without severe scrons (back then, there were more and more studies being published about uncircumcised children being ostracised and of the supposed benefits of the procedure), and I think her for not making my 'to kill and/or maim severely' list too long.
And there was also a case with a certain religious lad some dickhead named Sepanto/Avi Rosenfeld (I allow myself to write his name here, because he's one fat fuck you should be aware of. He is extremely intelligent, but is a pathological liar, a schmuck, and a horrible may fayner. And he doesn't understand anything about classic music, as much as he claims otherwise) decided to introduce me to. For about a year, the religious lad and I had a never-ending theological argument. He nearly convinced me the occasion at Mt. Sinai, as written in the Torah, is true, making the whole Torah true, but I managed to find some points of demagogy (so many slippery slopes regarding the Western culture...) and lies in his claims. Furthermore, he was the only religious person I've spoken to to claim the Torah has solid, logical proof (my physics teacher also claimed something about that, but didn't argue about it like him). You can find the basics to his proof on my Concession fanfic, Joel: Hindsight Impressions (I'd like to note my writing improved since I'd written it!). So if you're reading this now, Ido Ben-Yehuda Moshe Halevi, you can be certain I'm never speaking to you again. Ever.
That is why I'm not going to argue with 99% of the religious Jews. They just can't be trusted.
And of course, ceterum censeo Meam-She'arim Benem-Barakque esse delendas.
(EDIT: My most endeared second cousin Daya is going to compose a melody for my lullaby. This should certainly be worth listening!)
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